'Do you feel it? It's Christmas already.'
I ran into the living room to see some artificial snow, a fat box wrapped in red wrapping paper and a beautiful cake surrounded by candles. It was beautiful and had the Christmas feel.
I shouted Shahaaz, but nobody replied. I called him again and again but I got no reply.
I unwrapped the gift as I thought he'd be out to get food maybe. So I unwrapped the big fat box with my name on it and found a letter on the top of it. Inside the box were my pictures with Shahaaz and everything related to us that he ever had- as a sovereign of our bond.
So I pulled out the letter which was written on a Christmas special sheet with santa prints.
"Dear best friend,
Merry Christmas. So you're surprised to see the gift, aren't you; And the letter? Well, you'll know eventually.
So it's been a while since I stayed over. It's been a while since we relived all our childhood memories."
I stopped reading and ran to his room. His bag wasn't there but his closet had some clothes.
I took a breath of relief. I returned to the living room and continued reading.
" It was a wonderful time. But this journey has only made me realise that I never fell out of love with you. The numerous nights I spent here giggling with you in this room, all I knew was I loved you more than I could ever love anyone else. So yesterday I gathered enough courage to tell you all of this. But as I came near your room, I peeked in through the opening of the door to make sure you weren't sleeping and to my surprise you weren't only awake but with someone else."
I thought really hard but I never invited anyone to my place lately.
" You were occupied with Roan and his memories. I guess just like me, you were still in love. I saw you shed tears on his picture. And I knew this wasn't the correct time or maybe it never would be. I thought really hard that night. It hurt me physically thinking of you loving someone else but love wasn't supposed to give us pain, it was supposed to heal us from our existing miseries. So what that you don't love me. Somebody along the way will. And somebody will always make me fall for her too. And it won't be that bad. Maybe I'll always love you and maybe that is the best thing ever. But I won't let your love ruin me; And mine to ruin you. So I gathered these memories to take along with me but 'Yado ka bojh bahut bhari hota hai.' I couldn't. So I left this for you. And I left some of my memories and some of Roans in my room. I hope you don't stick to them. I hope you gather enough courage to burn it all. Because yesterday, I not only realised you loved him, I also realised I remind you of your past. A past that made you bitter. A past where you loved Roan more than me. And you living in the past haunts me. Burn his memories, start afresh. Because you're too young to believe life without him is impossible. You don't need a guy to define you or defend you. You're better than most people here. Believe in yourself. Gift yourself freedom. And get some Christmas spirit. Don't shed tears over me. Don't cry, 'Why do bad things happen to good people.' You're not Ross afterall. Cheer up. There's wine, cake and pizza on table, get drunk on wine and don't whine.
I love you, atleast till yet,
Yours
Gurshahaaz!"
Everybody left me on the verge of happiness but I won't give up on my happiness now, I thought. So I wiped my tears and ate the cake, gained some calories after all it's Christmas and I still have life within my soul. After all, Shahaaz and Roan would want me to be this way; confident and happy.
I ran into the living room to see some artificial snow, a fat box wrapped in red wrapping paper and a beautiful cake surrounded by candles. It was beautiful and had the Christmas feel.
I shouted Shahaaz, but nobody replied. I called him again and again but I got no reply.
I unwrapped the gift as I thought he'd be out to get food maybe. So I unwrapped the big fat box with my name on it and found a letter on the top of it. Inside the box were my pictures with Shahaaz and everything related to us that he ever had- as a sovereign of our bond.
So I pulled out the letter which was written on a Christmas special sheet with santa prints.
"Dear best friend,
Merry Christmas. So you're surprised to see the gift, aren't you; And the letter? Well, you'll know eventually.
So it's been a while since I stayed over. It's been a while since we relived all our childhood memories."
I stopped reading and ran to his room. His bag wasn't there but his closet had some clothes.
I took a breath of relief. I returned to the living room and continued reading.
" It was a wonderful time. But this journey has only made me realise that I never fell out of love with you. The numerous nights I spent here giggling with you in this room, all I knew was I loved you more than I could ever love anyone else. So yesterday I gathered enough courage to tell you all of this. But as I came near your room, I peeked in through the opening of the door to make sure you weren't sleeping and to my surprise you weren't only awake but with someone else."
I thought really hard but I never invited anyone to my place lately.
" You were occupied with Roan and his memories. I guess just like me, you were still in love. I saw you shed tears on his picture. And I knew this wasn't the correct time or maybe it never would be. I thought really hard that night. It hurt me physically thinking of you loving someone else but love wasn't supposed to give us pain, it was supposed to heal us from our existing miseries. So what that you don't love me. Somebody along the way will. And somebody will always make me fall for her too. And it won't be that bad. Maybe I'll always love you and maybe that is the best thing ever. But I won't let your love ruin me; And mine to ruin you. So I gathered these memories to take along with me but 'Yado ka bojh bahut bhari hota hai.' I couldn't. So I left this for you. And I left some of my memories and some of Roans in my room. I hope you don't stick to them. I hope you gather enough courage to burn it all. Because yesterday, I not only realised you loved him, I also realised I remind you of your past. A past that made you bitter. A past where you loved Roan more than me. And you living in the past haunts me. Burn his memories, start afresh. Because you're too young to believe life without him is impossible. You don't need a guy to define you or defend you. You're better than most people here. Believe in yourself. Gift yourself freedom. And get some Christmas spirit. Don't shed tears over me. Don't cry, 'Why do bad things happen to good people.' You're not Ross afterall. Cheer up. There's wine, cake and pizza on table, get drunk on wine and don't whine.
I love you, atleast till yet,
Yours
Gurshahaaz!"
Everybody left me on the verge of happiness but I won't give up on my happiness now, I thought. So I wiped my tears and ate the cake, gained some calories after all it's Christmas and I still have life within my soul. After all, Shahaaz and Roan would want me to be this way; confident and happy.
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